"A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti."

" A 26 Year old religious fanatic from the Ukraine, known only as Vlad, was taken into custody after he was found to have been cannibalizing his grandmother while she was still alive. I know food in the former USSR is notoriously bad but, really though? Perhaps they should have left the Berlin wall standing; certain Western phrases just don't translate well. Nana probably didn't know Vlad the Inhaler was going to take her sassy, "Eat Me!" so far. There's messed up and then there's..... really though?"