Charlie Sheen Bashes Wife: Court Sentences Him to Mentor Young Actors. He's the half a man right?

" A Los Angeles court has sentenced Charlie Sheen to community service after he assaulted his wife on a recent ski trip in Colorado. Charlie is set to make up for his indiscretions by coaching young actors. In what, hooker selection? Hey kid, you're chopping that line all wrong. First of all don't use your license..are you daft? Use your gas card. Second, punch your wife in the ovary instead of the eye if at all possible, you don't want to be reminded of your own belligerence every time you look her in the face, and you really shouldn't reproduce. Hey justice system, fuck off. Also.... really though?"